Bringing a toy into your relationship is a great way to try something new together. It does not replace anything – it simply adds more ways to enjoy each other. This guide will help you start the conversation and choose your first couples toy.
1. Start with a relaxed conversation
Choose a calm moment, not the middle of things. Keep it light and positive: “I saw something that might be fun to try together.” Ask what your partner is curious about, share your own ideas and agree that either of you can say no or pause at any time.
2. Choose a toy you both like
Browsing together is half the fun. These are some of the easiest toys for couples:
- Remote control vibrators – one person wears or uses the toy, the other holds the remote. Our wireless love egg and remote control rabbit vibrator are popular choices. Read our remote control vibrators guide for ideas.
- Slim vibrators – small, simple and easy to use during foreplay. See our slim vibrators guide.
- Prostate massagers – a way for partners with a prostate to explore new sensations. Start with our beginner's guide.
- Lingerie – not a toy, but a simple way to set the mood. Browse our lingerie collection.
3. Start slowly
Use the toy during foreplay first, keep the intensity low and build up. Check in with each other and laugh if things feel awkward – that is completely normal the first time.
4. Take turns being in control
Toys with remotes or multiple modes make it easy to share control. Swapping roles keeps things playful and helps you both learn what you enjoy.
5. Lubricant and hygiene
A water-based lubricant makes everything more comfortable and is safe with silicone toys. Clean your toys before and after each use, and never move a toy from anal to vaginal use without washing it first. Our cleaning guide explains how.
6. Talk afterwards
Share what you liked and what you would change. Every conversation makes the next experience better.
Browse our range
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